"911, what is your emergency?"

** Let me start by saying that everyone is okay! **

Monday started like any normal day. The boys and I went to the gym, I dropped them at the gym daycare, and attempted to start a workout, but just a few minutes later, the daycare worker came and got me and told me Ben was too upset, I had to take him home. This happens on occasion, he has learned that standing at the door and screaming is the fastest way back home -- and it drives me crazy that my options are to either stay at home and not try going to the gym, or to reinforce this behavior and leave when he starts screaming (because the daycare workers will not allow him to stay in there like that!). He fell asleep in the car on the drive home, and when I woke him up, he was unhappy, and started hitting his brother. I put him in timeout, he continued to cry. I took him out of timeout, put him on the floor with his stuffed monkey and a cup of milk, and I walked away to use the bathroom. As I turned my back on him, I heard him inhale, and for some reason (Mother's intuition?), I stopped to listen to him exhale -- and didn't hear him, so I peeked back around the corner -- and he was totally grey and rigid, just laying on the floor. I ran over and grabbed him and started shaking him and yelling "BEN!" at him, but he was completely nonresponsive, totally stick-stiff, grey, and not breathing.

I ran to the phone and dialed 911, and gave Ben two breaths (thank goodness we were required to take CPR before they were discharged from the NICU). I tried talking to the 911 operator, but was just crying, "HE'S NOT BREATHING! SEND SOMEONE TO HELP ME!" Thank goodness phone numbers and addresses are linked, because she had already dispatched an ambulance. Ben was on the floor, still not breathing, totally grey, and stiff, his eyes glazed over and staring off into the distance, so I gave him two more breaths. His legs and arms started shaking and convulsing, and he threw his head back and went stiff and still again. He peed all over himself and me, and I gave him another breath, and he took a big breath in and started crying. He rolled over onto his side, and cried, totally out of it, had absolutely no idea what was going on.

At that point, the 911 operator told me to unlock the door because the paramedics had arrived, so I opened the door, and 2 firemen and a police officer came in. By that point, Ben was on the floor, crying, soaking wet, and totally out of it. The ambulance arrived a minute later, and the paramedic assessed Ben, and told me he had to be seen at the ER, that he had likely had a febrile seizure (which are common in children at this age), but was concerned because Ben did not have a fever (which would be present if this was a febrile seizure). I was home alone with the boys, and the paramedics said it was unsafe for me to drive Ben in case he had another seizure, so we all had to go in the ambulance. Sam was very unhappy and scared, and screamed as the paramedic strapped him into the the seat of the ambulance (they have seat attachments that are basically the 5-point harness of a toddler carseat), and I was overwhelmed with Mommy-guilt, as I was basically forced to ignore Sam in order to focus my attention on Ben, strapped to the gurney, and the EMT, who was asking me a million questions.

The Husband met us at the ER, thankfully, and was able to hold Ben, which helped to quell Ben's panic. The doctors performed a number of tests (including a blood draw -- during which Mommy got to hold Ben did, but he did incredibly well, and was just MAD at the nurse for "pinching" his arm and taking some "ketchup" -- his words!), and determined that there was no fever or infection, so the seizure wasn't a febrile seizure, which would have been the "easy" answer. The doctor then sent Ben for a CT Scan to rule out a head injury or trauma that could have caused the seizure, as well as a mass, which could cause seizures. Thankfully, the CT Scan came back normal, so the doctor told us we could be discharged, but would see Ben's pediatrician first thing the next morning.

We met with the pediatrician yesterday, and discussed everything that had happened. Ben apparently had a grand mal seizure, and less than 2% of children will experience this type of seizure. Of those children who have a grand mal seizure, about 70% will never have a second seizure, and we hope we are in that majority percentage. The other 30% will have a second seizure, and at that point, are labeled epileptic and medicated with anti-seizure medication. We will see a pediatric neurologist at some point soon, and have an EEG performed on Ben to see if the origin of seizure can be determined and if there is brain activity that could indicate epilepsy. Like I said, we are remaining optimistic that this was a one-time occurrence, but if it should be something more serious, it is in Ben's favor that he is young, and would likely outgrow this condition.