I didn't write about this in my last post, but decided to share this story. And Elaine -- you might want to skip this post.
The night I was admitted, I'm sure I looked absolutely terrified as I signed the consent forms for a c-section and for the boys to be admitted to the NICU. The doctor on call that night (and all through the weekend) was incredibly compassionate, and took so much time with me and my family that weekend. Anyway, as he explained the procedures I was consenting to, he took a minute and told me the story of a woman in a room down the hall from me. I don't know her name, I don't know anything about her, but her story sticks with me, and I thought about her a lot last year at this time, and I am thinking about her again this year, and I'm sure I will think about her every year.
This woman was admitted the same day I was, she was also in active labor, yet she was only 22 weeks pregnant. Some hospitals push viability to 23 weeks, but at most hospitals, including the UCONN Health Center (which has a Level III NICU), viability is 24 weeks. This woman's labor was too far advanced and the doctors were unable to stop her labor. She delivered a baby who did not survive. And, what makes her story even more painful is that she wasn't from this area, was simply here on a business trip, and went through the ordeal without the support of any loved ones. Her husband got on a flight as soon as he heard she was in labor, but missed the birth of their daughter, and missed being there for his wife during this painful experience.
I know my OB told me this story to reassure me that my boys would be just fine -- that 22 weeks is very scary, but 30 weeks would be just fine. As I look back on the experience, I am thankful to him for taking this time, because in that moment, 30 weeks also seemed way too early and way too scary. But in reality, he was right, things turned out just fine for my boys.
This woman and I share an anniversary in that March 6 is the day we went into labor -- yet when I think about her experience, my heart breaks for her. Our experiences were so different. Mine ended so joyfully and so positively, and hers ended in heart-ache. I wonder how she is doing today ...
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2 comments:
I am so thankful for your anniversary (that you were far enough along)and so sad for that woman. She and I are both 22 weeks and I take each day as a wonderful day that baby is doing well because I don't take any day for granted because you had said your pregnancy was textbook until you were at school and went into labor.
I do not get freaked out from your post but rather just thankful. My quasi-step sister (long story) went into labor around 24 weeks and her baby lived for a few minutes. However I cannot worry about what could happen because I will miss out on all the positives that are happening.
My heart though does go out to that woman on this day!!!!!
Time just flies by... I really didn't believe that Lydia would be fine either. And she really is. It's one of those weird 'yay' and 'booo' anniversaries!!
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